I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
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I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
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i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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