its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
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