I will die if light touches me.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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