Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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