I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
So many bounce houses so little time
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize