Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
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Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
drinking out of a sandbucket again
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
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I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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