Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize