a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
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