I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
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