They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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