he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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