How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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