...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
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