Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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