The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize