If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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