you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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