Michael Bay diarrhea
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize