She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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