walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
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I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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