He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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