sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize