So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took a bar mat shot.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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