did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
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She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
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Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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