his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
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