yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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