i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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