I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize