I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize