I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
There's always time for handjobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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