im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
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