It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize