Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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