If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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