operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize