If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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