She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize