Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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