Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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