life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
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