I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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