Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
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Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
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We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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