I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I don't deserve a penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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