oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
