You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
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I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
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Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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