I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize