i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
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talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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