I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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