i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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