he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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